it goes vwoom together

So so soooooo… so. Today I attended my first full period of my Neuro class. It was fascinating, no joke! For the first time this semester I had adequately prepared and then made an effort to participate in class. I think that the reason I found it interesting was twofold. First, today we discussed the means and method of communication between neurons. A large part of this discussion was focused on the chemical transactions at the synaptic cleft. Lately I have become quite fascinated with the introduction of certain chemicals (medications) into the nervous system. We talked about many drugs I have grown familiar with and then discovered their actual mechanisms (as far as we can tell). Am I making sense? Bleh.. It was fun because I was able to contribute information on the drug / neuron interaction, and also learn some really interesting things.

The second cause for interest in class is an idea I just recently took to calling the outward-in principle. I’m told that in Europe, the most popular way for actors to get into character, is to adopt the outward appearances and mannerisms of the role they are to portray. The idea is that if they change is made on the outside, the actual being will change, on the inside. Applied to my life: act the way you want to be and your being will change.

I perched myself on the edge of my seat and devoted my full attention to Dr. Brown. I told myself that I was so enthralled with the topic of discussion that I couldn’t peel my attention away. After a few minutes I was genuinely excited to be in class. I wonder how many other people use this technique to triumph through undesired situations… If you can fake it at first, true action will follow.

Yesterday I watched a home movie from my brother’s fourth birthday party. It was hilarious. I (age nine) had dressed as a clown and was something of an entertainer at the party. I was watching the video with my family and we couldn’t stop laughing. I had never seen this video before but it was so funny to see myself acting in such a way, and then remembering my thoughts.

There was one point during the party where my mom lined up a row of buckets, in increasing distance, and the children had to toss a ball into them. All the children were able to make the ball into the closest bucket.. but then I gave it a go and awkwardly hurled the ball against the side of the container. Now I was like five years older than all these other kids and pride myself on my fine motor control.. but how embarrassing.

I’m about to disclose dark family secrets.. but I’m not going to think about it and just type. Bradley (brother) used to dance when he had to go to the bathroom. It’s true. At the beginning of the party he was swaying just a little bit. As things moved on his shuffles from foot to foot became more and more frantic. By the time he began opening presents he was up on tippy toes really prancing.

During the watching I made considerable reference to this fact and was happy to shift the embarrassment to another after my poor display of ball chuckin’ skills.

/sigh, I feel all sentimental all of a sudden. Silly life.

This entry was posted on Monday, September 25th, 2006 at 12:25 pm and is filed under obsessions. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.